User blog:Mrs Chanandler Bong/Head to Toe, So Player - The Five Best Billboard Hits of 2016

Hello there, and welcome to Stupid Lyrics, but less stupid and more actually good songs. Today I'll be counting down the best hit songs from 2016 in my opinion. The only rule is they had to be somewhere in the Billboard Hot 100 top 40 at sometime in 2016. Yeah they're very broad rules, but it's been made pretty clear that I don't like pop music so, I guess we should just get on with the countdown.

​#5
When you look up in any dictionary the phrase "quilty pleasure", this will be its definition.

Quilty pleasure (phrase; noun) '''​No. 5: "24K Magic" by Bruno Mars'''
 * PUT YO' PINKY RINGS UP TO THE MOON

​This song is fun, it's energetic, it's just dumb fun and that's obviously what Bruno Mars was going for here. It's a brag rap song but with a funky early 90's synth/bassline that works so well with the chorus, which is just so happy, contrasting pretty much the whole of 2016's music. "I Hate U, I Love U", "Heathens", "Work", "Too Good"... even the party songs were monotonous and boring. I can't remember what this song peaked at but who cares? It's dumb fun, so have it.

​Head to toe, so playa

​Damn right you are, Bruno. Damn right.

​#4
Can I take a break from this little countdown just to say how much of a nonsensical bowl of word salad "Starboy" by the Weeknd is.

So he starts with the typical brag rap, "side bitches" and stuff like that, but the pre-chorus is about furniture?

''House so empty, need a centerpiece Twenty racks a table cut from ebony Cut that ivory into skinny pieces Then she clean it with her face man I love my baby''

Sorry? I'm guessing he's talking about his "side bitch" here? I dunno who's cleaning what up with her face but you know, there's a funky easy-to-dance-to groove to it, so this can cover up the terrible lyrics, right? And it does... very well.

'No. 4: "Starboy" by The Weeknd feat. Daft Punk'

Weeknd needed Daft Punk. This would've been terrible but that groove, that beat... it's amazing, and I love that "ah-ha-ha" thing they had to the chorus. It's so strange and futuristic which fits with how Weeknd is saying all this nonsensical bullshit. It peaked at number one.

But the chorus is just complete nonsense, which doesn't even have a correlating theme. You made me a Starboy, Goddamnit! I dunno.

''Look what you've done I’m a motherfuckin' starboy''

​Also Weeknd seems to think that Star Trek has some sort of correlation to girls getting naked.

Star Trek roof in that Wrath of Khan Girls get loose when they hear this song

​It's just so random and weird - I really like it.

​To be continued