User blog:Omgitskittykatty/The Real Jim Bagely

 May I have your attention, please  May I have your attention, please  Will the real Jim Bagely, please stand up  I repeat, will the real Jim Bagely, please stand up  We're gonna have a problem here  [Verse 1]  Ya'll act like you never seen, a white person before  Jaws all on the floor, like Pam like Tommy just burst in the door  And started whoopin' her __, worse than before  They first were divorced, throwin' her over furniture -(Krazy screams)-  It's the return of the, oh wait, no way, you're kidding  He didn't just say, what I think he did, did he  And Gray Pea Shoot said, nothing you idiots  Gray Pea Shoot's dead he's locked in my basement -(laughs)- <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;">Feminist women love Bagel Jim <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;">Chicka-chicka-chicka Jim Bagely, I'm sick of him <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> Look at him, walkin' around, grabbin' his you know what <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> Flippin' to you know who, yeah but he's so cute though <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;">Yeah, I probably got a couple of screws up in my head loose <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> But no worse, than what's goin' on in your parents bedrooms <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> Sometimes, I wanna get on TV and just let loose, but can't <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> But it's cool for Tom Green, to hump a dead moose <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;">My bum is on your lips, my bum is on your lips <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> And if I'm lucky you might, just give it a little kiss <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> And that's the message, that we deliver to little kids <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> And expect them not to know, what a woman's ___ is <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;">Of course they're gonna know what intercourse is <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> By the time they hit fourth grade, they got the Discovery Channel don't they <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> We ain't nothing but mammals, well some of us are cannibals <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> Who cut other people open like cantaloupes <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;">But if we can hump dead animals and antelopes <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> Then there's no reason that a man, and another man can't elope <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> But if you feel like I feel, I got the antidote <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> Women wave your pantyhose, sing the chorus and it goes <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;">[Chorus] <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> I'm Jim Bagely, yes I'm the real Bagely <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> All you other Jim Bagelies, are just imitating <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> So won't the real Bagely, please stand up <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> Please stand up, please stand up (x2) <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;">[Verse 2] <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> Kra-zy don't gotta cuss in his raps, to sell records <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> Well I do, so _ him and _ you too <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> You think I give a damn about a Grammy <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> Half of you critics can't even stomach me, let alone stand me <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;">But Jim, what if you win, wouldn't it be weird <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> Why, so you guys can just lie to get me here <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> So you can, sit me here next to Zophi, dear <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> _, Dimentio8 better switch me chairs, yeah <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;">So I can sit next to King of Sprites and Fred Durst <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> And hear 'em argue over, who she gave head to first <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> Little bitch put me on blast, on MTV <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> Yeah he's cute, but I think he's married to him (lol a gay joke), hehe <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;">I should download her audio, on MP3 <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> And show the whole world, how you gave Bagel Jim VD <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> I'm sick of you little girl and boy groups, all you do is annoy me <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> So I have been sent here, to destroy you <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;">And there's a million of us just like me <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> Who cuss like me, who just don't give a _ like me <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> Who dress like me, walk talk and act like me <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> And just might be, the next best thing, but not quite me <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;">[Chorus] <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;">[Verse 3] <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> I'm like a head trip to listen to, 'cause I'm only giving you <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> Things you joke about with your friends, inside your livin' room <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> The only difference is I got the balls to say it, in front of ya'll <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;">And I don't gotta be false, or sugar-coat it at all <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;">I just get on the mic and spit it <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;">And whether you like to admit it, (Rip) I just _ it <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;">Better than ninety percent of you rappers out can <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> Then you wonder how can kids, eat up these albums like valiums it's funny <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;">'Cause at the rate I'm going, when I'm thirty <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> I'll be the only person, in the nursing home flirting <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> Pinching nurses asses, while I'm jackin' off with Jergens <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> And I'm jerkin', but this whole bag of Viagra isn't workin' <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;">In every single person there's a slim shady lurkin' <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> who could be workin' at Burger King, spittin' on your onion rings <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> Or in the parking lot circling, screamin' I don't give a _ <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> With his windows down, and his system up <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;">So will the real Bagely, please stand up <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> And put one of those fingers, on each hand up <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> And be proud to be outta your mind, and outta control <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> And one more time loud as you can, how's it go <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;">[Chorus]

<span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;">[Outro] <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;"> Haha, guess there's a Jim Bagely in all of us <span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;">_ it, let's all stand up

<span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;">-next time:

<span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;">You better lose yourself

<span style="color:rgb(213,212,212);font-family:Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size:14px;text-align:-webkit-center;">In the music... the moment

<p style="text-align:-webkit-center;"> mwmwkamqkwwmwmwmw let it go, go

<p style="text-align:-webkit-center;"> don't blow

<p style="text-align:-webkit-center;"> cause you blow always

<p style="text-align:-webkit-center;"> you suck

<p style="text-align:-webkit-center;"> you suck butt